Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Randomize
