Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
Ladies, if you have recieved this text then you are one of the lucky few friends I have decided to make this proposal to. As you all know, my boyfriend's birthday is in two weeks and I have finally decided on the perfect present. Surprise threesome. Now, there can only be one, this isn't an orgy you know, so I will be rating the ideal candidates on bra size and sluttyness. Experiance will count, references if available. Inbox me your credentials so we can come to a...Satisfying agreement.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
