yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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