Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Randomize
