I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
the highlight of my day was when my dad called me when I was watching porn and I muted it instead of pausing it.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
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