Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
