K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Randomize
