she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize