I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize