Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Randomize