Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
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