Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
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