whjeg hajt iyt
wanna hang out?
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"