I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...
And the cops told us we were all naked.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Randomize
