Midget sex pt 2 tonight
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
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