The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Randomize
