I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Dear god my vagina.
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