I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
You took a bar mat shot.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
