Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
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