my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize
