he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
