Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
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