put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Randomize
