i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Randomize
