i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
i think im in europe. pls send help
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
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