I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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