omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
i just google imaged poop.
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
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