I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
