How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Dear god my vagina.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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