Nicole vs. Life
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
Randomize
