Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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