"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
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