Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
He kissed a someone with a penis
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.