Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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