It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize
