well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Randomize
