:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
Randomize