yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
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