this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
