hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
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