Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (401): remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice? (401): we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession. http://tfl.nu/61ek
  Replies (41) Good night (812) Bad night (2664)
• Favorite

  (903): View more from Texas

  I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.

  (903): View more from Texas

  That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (903): I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative. (903): That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame. http://tfl.nu/rh6l
  Replies (30) Good night (738) Bad night (3451)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (518): i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage. http://tfl.nu/gxvx
  Replies (6) Good night (2904) Bad night (882)
• Favorite

  (650): View more from California

  Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (650): Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss http://tfl.nu/9lml
  Replies (40) Good night (5789) Bad night (1519)
• Favorite

  (480): View more from Arizona

  omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (480): omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house. http://tfl.nu/91p3
  Replies (60) Good night (2002) Bad night (5905)
• Favorite

  (646): View more from New York

  Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (646): Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient http://tfl.nu/jyiu
  Replies (29) Good night (1270) Bad night (5403)
• Favorite

  (971): View more from Oregon

  I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (971): I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again. http://tfl.nu/g2lj
  Replies (9) Good night (890) Bad night (4111)
• Favorite

  (712): View more from Iowa

  buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (712): buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks. http://tfl.nu/xy6a
  Replies (5) Good night (3331) Bad night (870)
• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (813): He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand. http://tfl.nu/9yan
  Replies (10) Good night (978) Bad night (3301)
• Favorite

  (916): View more from California

  I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (916): I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge http://tfl.nu/9m2f
  Replies (4) Good night (992) Bad night (929)
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (970): I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend." http://tfl.nu/7i0l
  Replies (9) Good night (610) Bad night (2655)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (610): My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help. http://tfl.nu/86v6
  Replies (8) Good night (1442) Bad night (547)
• Favorite

  (747): View more from California

  That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (747): That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away! http://tfl.nu/9pk5
  Replies (2) Good night (377) Bad night (662)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (630): Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger. http://tfl.nu/07lb
  Replies (3) Good night (794) Bad night (314)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (814): Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good. http://tfl.nu/cttc
  Replies (1) Good night (589) Bad night (267)

Randomize