Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
Randomize
