How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
Randomize