question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
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