you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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