how can u be prego again
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize
