xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Randomize
