i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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