if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
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you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
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I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
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