He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
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