Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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