butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
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